Sorry For The Delay | EP.15 | Christmas Parties, Line Dancing & Wash Your Hands
This week, Joshua recaps a Christmas party that had great vibes, questionable “coffee,” & one very lucky gift swap, we argue about tipping etiquette, line dancing bravery, & why some folks absolutely need a PSA about soap, Sean nabs a Funko steal while Joshua scores a LEGO grail, & we wrap with a fortune that hits just right (dreams first.). All that & more! Enjoy the show!
-WHAT’S IN OUR CUP-
Sean: Whiskey on the rocks
Joshua: Espresso in a Yoda cup
-CHAPTERS-
00:00 New Year Cold Open, Mia’s Intro & Housekeeping
02:45 This Day In Tech: iTunes, iPhone & A “Walking Car”
06:45 Monarch Butterfly Drop: The 86% Shock
08:30 TV Heartbreak: What We Do In The Shadows Ending
10:20 Joshua’s Christmas Party Recap Begins
18:55 Gift Raffle Chaos: PS5 Luck, Xbox Hopes & Candy Basket L
26:50 Dance Floor Report: Can You Do The Line Dance?
33:30 Party Confidence, Outfits & “PG… Kind Of”
36:40 Moderation Talk, Bottles & The Long Game
44:10 Public Service Announcement: Wash Your Hands
52:20 Fun Finds: LEGO “UP” House Swap Win
55:50 Value Find: Mr. Bill Funko for $4.98
59:00 Fortune Cookie + Lucky Numbers
1:01:40 Sign-Off & Tease For What’s Next
-SOUND BITES-
• “This week’s episode has a service announcement: please wash your hands.” — Mia setting the tone.
• “The rope broke, the countdown wasn’t real, reset my clock, I’m ready.” — Joshua’s New Year energy.
• “Apple announced iTunes in 2001, then the iPhone in 2007 — the ‘i’ era was wild.” — Joshua on tech history.
• “Hyundai unveiled a walking car for first responders… in Vegas.” — Sean reacting to the headline.
• “California’s monarch butterfly count dropped by 86% — that one hurt.” — Joshua on the nature note.
• “One of my favorite shows is ending after season six — What We Do In The Shadows is bowing out.” — Sean’s TV heartbreak.
• “I posted up like a wallflower & people-watched my own Christmas party.” — Joshua on party mode.
• “First number pulled… PS5 gone. Rigged? Maybe. Hilarious? Absolutely.” — Joshua on the raffle chaos.
• “I want to learn that line dance — it looked doable, even for me.” — Joshua catching dance fever.
• “Be brave, get on the floor, I’ll teach you — it’s not hard.” — Sean issuing the challenge.
• “Wash your hands. With soap. Not just water. And don’t forget your thumbs.” — Joshua’s PSA.
• “Special K, sponsor us — we’ll make it rain fortune cookies.” — Sean dreaming big.
• “To make dreams real, first you have to have them.” — The episode’s fortune.
• “I swapped a candy basket & came home with the LEGO ‘UP’ house.” — Joshua’s win of the night.
• “Mr. Bill for $4.98… currently going for fifty. Profit, baby.” — Sean’s value find victory.
-FORTUNE & FINDS-
Fortune: To make dreams real, first you have to have them.
Lucky Numbers: 20, 35, 14, 45, 39, 19
Fun Finds / Value Finds:
Sean: Mr. Bill (Schoolhouse Rock) Funko — scanned at Target for $7, stacked credits, out the door for $4.98. Currently valued around $50.
Joshua: LEGO “UP” House — Christmas party swap upgrade from a candy basket to a Pixar grail; instant build plans pending.
(Artwork Shoutout: None This Episode)
Transcript
0:00:00.240,0:00:05.200
welcome to sorry for the delay I'm your editor
Mia I hope everyone had a great start to the
0:00:05.200,0:00:11.200
New Year in this week's episode Joshua gives a
Christmas party recap we ask the question can
0:00:11.200,0:00:16.240
you do the dance and a service announcement
from the sorry for the delay crew please wash
0:00:16.240,0:00:24.120
your hands after using the bathroom enjoy
the [Music] show let's do it hello Joshua
0:00:24.120,0:00:34.080
welcome to episode 15 of sorry for the delay a
podcast with you and I how are you Joshua I'm
0:00:34.080,0:00:41.360
feeling great it's a new year 2024 this you
know we made it sea is still alive everybody
0:00:41.360,0:00:48.840
the countdown wasn't real yeah he made it he
made it none of it matters reset my clock I'm
0:00:48.840,0:00:57.560
ready you should all know the Rope broke when he
jumped from the table you know the Rope broke it
0:00:57.560,0:01:05.960
didn't a little voice in my head his neck your
time yet buddy yeah yeah I found him on the floor
0:01:05.960,0:01:13.520
he was covered in Piss but I milked him back to
life why Always covered in and he is here with
0:01:13.520,0:01:18.640
everybody why is that always in my life the other
day got so drunk covered myself in Piss why is
0:01:18.640,0:01:26.360
that my thing well some of us got to just go and
we got to go you know a toilet is never needed at
0:01:26.360,0:01:34.520
all times you can just go oh [ __ ] me uh Joshua
speaking of my timers do you have how many days
0:01:34.520,0:01:41.520
I have left for this year Joshua unfortunately
because it's only nine days in I think we can all
0:01:41.520,0:01:49.600
figure that math out I don't have the calculation
on this January 9th oh man you know I can't do
0:01:49.600,0:01:57.000
that not quite not quite there damn it yeah so
uh maybe next time I'll have that number for
0:01:57.000,0:02:02.200
you Sean we can we can we can you know glue that
rope together we can try all again at the end of
0:02:02.200,0:02:07.640
this year and give it another leap I'm okay with
that I'm okay with that uh what about some history
0:02:07.640,0:02:12.480
lessons for me Joshua you got some new history
lessons for this new year you changing it up
0:02:12.480,0:02:19.920
are you sticking to the same what are what are we
doing Joshua yeah so I I figure we uh we start the
0:02:19.920,0:02:24.600
the new year off on this January 9th with a little
bit of tech news I know there's a lot of tech
0:02:24.600,0:02:29.760
people out there that love gadgets and gizmos and
but all those start somewhere right my vibrator so
0:02:32.360,0:02:34.240
hey the new ones are solar just put them outside
0:02:34.240,0:02:37.520
your car for 30 minutes and you
can you have a nuner anytime you
0:02:37.520,0:02:47.720
want so for this January 9th we're going to
kick it off with a little bit of Tech History
0:02:47.720,0:02:56.400
so in 2001 Apple announced iTunes at the Mac
World Expo in San Francisco for organizing and
0:02:56.400,0:03:06.280
playing digital music and videos thank you Apple
nice thank you Apple I appreciate it yeah I I had
0:03:06.280,0:03:14.960
an I had a uh an iTunes iPad i iPod I had one of
those to at one point something with an eye in it
0:03:14.960,0:03:19.760
yeah I don't I mean does anybody even listen to
iTunes or Spotify anymore I I listen to Spotify
0:03:19.760,0:03:25.840
all time iTunes like I don't listen to iTunes
that's not even a thing anymore for me so yeah
0:03:25.840,0:03:32.480
I think there I think iTunes is officially dead
yeah probably um yeah so uh thank you uh Apple
0:03:32.480,0:03:43.360
you know 2001 for my number two in the tech news
in this uh January 9th in 2007 Apple CEO Steve
0:03:43.360,0:03:52.000
Jobs announces the iPhone so we're going with the
I I uh I Guy theme for these first two here so if
0:03:52.000,0:03:57.400
you're an iPhone person uh and you weren't born
in 2007 well that's when they came out you know
0:03:57.400,0:04:07.160
before you were born before your time oh s yes
and my final uh Tech History news on this January
0:04:07.160,0:04:19.200
9th in 2019 car manufacturer hyai Hyundai Hyundai
unveils unveils a model of a proposed walking car
0:04:19.200,0:04:25.000
for First Responders in Las Vegas what the [ __ ]
what the [ __ ] does that look I can't wait to see
0:04:25.000,0:04:29.320
what this looks like uh when I get this edit I'm
GNA I'm going to be [ __ ] amazed about how this
0:04:29.320,0:04:34.480
looks because what the hell does that mean what
is a walking car did they just make a Transformer
0:04:34.480,0:04:41.360
and didn't tell anybody is that how this goes
I have no idea when I saw that thing pop up I
0:04:41.360,0:04:47.080
was like well you know 2019 that's not that long
ago you know just kind of yesterday for some of
0:04:47.080,0:04:54.400
us yeah um but I too myself am curious what this
proposed walking car and I guess they're in Vegas
0:04:54.400,0:04:59.120
so for you shitfaced fools out there uh be on the
lookout when your face hits the concrete after one
0:04:59.120,0:05:04.400
two many for this you're not seeing thing this
car is actually walking up to you it's it's not
0:05:04.400,0:05:11.920
the mushrooms it's a real thing that's going to
be coming your way oh [ __ ] Chad look at that
0:05:11.920,0:05:21.160
oh [ __ ] it's a [ __ ] walking car God damn but I
do have a little bit of sad news um sad news this
0:05:21.160,0:05:25.720
one goes into a different category yeah nobody
I mean I just I have to throw it out there cuz I
0:05:25.720,0:05:29.560
love science I love nature you know we got a few
categories here I gave you a little bit of tech
0:05:29.560,0:05:33.520
news I'm going to give you one more that that kind
of touched my heart a little bit because where we
0:05:33.520,0:05:40.760
live I believe it's Natural Bridges there is a
certain time of the year where a [ __ ] ton of
0:05:40.760,0:05:46.320
monarch butterfly butterflies actually congregate
and they they I don't know if you've ever seen
0:05:46.320,0:05:58.040
that but I have in 2019 California's monarch
butterfly count dropped by 86% according to uh
0:05:58.040,0:06:03.840
2018 sentence census that's a lot that's a lot of
percentage Joshua that means only 20% of them are
0:06:03.840,0:06:10.080
left holy spit that makes me sad yeah that was
that was that was kind of sad when I read that
0:06:10.080,0:06:15.280
because I do remember going as a kid I don't know
how many of you uh locals around here where where
0:06:15.280,0:06:21.000
I live where I'm casting from had ever taken a
trip out there it it used to be a a pretty cool
0:06:21.000,0:06:26.840
site out there um hopefully those come back at
some point and you guys get to take advantage of
0:06:26.840,0:06:33.200
that because it's it's a pretty cool uh sight to
see all those monarchs just clustered together in
0:06:33.200,0:06:40.960
giant you know looking sacks course um and that's
all I got that's that's a little bit of tech news
0:06:40.960,0:06:47.360
a little bit of environmental planetary news for
my this day in uh history in January 9th nice
0:06:47.360,0:06:54.560
Joshua thank you for that thank you for that uh I
like the theming the tech theming it's really cool
0:06:54.560,0:07:01.280
um I have been to the Butterfly Place a few times
I've seen millions of butterflies it was freaking
0:07:01.280,0:07:07.480
spectacular um makes me sad that does make me sad
I have some sad news too Joshua I just found this
0:07:07.480,0:07:13.200
out before we got onto the air here um not as
sad as butterflies but one of my favorite shows
0:07:13.200,0:07:19.360
is ending after season six uh the show is called
what we do in the shadows it's about vampires shot
0:07:19.360,0:07:27.080
in that uh office style documentary style um or
like shot in the office style like the documentary
0:07:27.080,0:07:34.560
style of shooting you know it's ending after
season six which is the last the One season uh
0:07:34.560,0:07:40.920
I'm very sad my heart is broken uh to any of the
FX people watching this podcast because I know you
0:07:40.920,0:07:48.840
watch and you listen uh don't do that don't end
it just you know let it keep going forever like
0:07:48.840,0:07:55.200
a vampire yeah I've I've never heard of that show
before uh send it this way send me the link I you
0:07:55.200,0:08:01.440
know I'd like to check it out I mean I'm in the
vampires getting sucked up watch all those True
0:08:01.440,0:08:07.080
Blood you know who doesn't like a good freaking
we talked a little bit about uh the old uh yeah
0:08:07.080,0:08:11.600
who didn't watch True Blood come on is there
any True Blood people out there come on watch
0:08:11.600,0:08:17.400
True Blood True Blood baby yeah somebody somebody
watch it there's a bunch of vampire show uh Jos
0:08:17.400,0:08:25.240
Joshua I also have to acknowledge um our previous
episode uh I'm happy that you came up Joshua I'm
0:08:25.240,0:08:30.120
I'm really happy and excited that I got to see
you uh I'm assuming we had a great time I don't
0:08:30.120,0:08:35.920
remember all of it it was probably really fun um
I know I probably touched you once or twice once
0:08:35.920,0:08:41.000
on purpose maybe twice on accident who who would
have known I wouldn't have known every night was
0:08:41.000,0:08:47.360
just blacked out for me it was fun I I mean we can
just blame it on the large crowds there's a bunch
0:08:47.360,0:08:51.760
of people bumping into each other you know who
knows who's grabbing whose ass could have been
0:08:51.760,0:08:56.320
mine could have been the neighbors could have
been you know at this at that point it's just
0:08:56.320,0:09:00.760
everybody's just ass grabbing you know when you're
that yeah you know know on top of each other and
0:09:00.760,0:09:08.440
oh yeah it was it was great to see you you know
it's been a while since I've had the opportunity
0:09:08.440,0:09:15.400
to to smell the musk that you put in the air
you know even from 5 feet away you know just I
0:09:15.400,0:09:19.760
know you don't really get that Essence anymore
I mean you can't I wish we had like 4D Vision
0:09:19.760,0:09:24.840
or like 4D stuff so you could smell me as we're
podcasting that would be pretty cool like right
0:09:24.840,0:09:33.280
now I smell like hot dogs which is you probably
don't want that but still um yeah normally I mean
0:09:33.280,0:09:41.040
because we don't have 4D normally sea smells like
like uh a brand new Christmas tree you know he he
0:09:41.040,0:09:47.160
year round just smells like pine needles and and
he actually is all sappy just like one too oh that
0:09:47.160,0:09:58.040
is definitely true yeah I'm sappy and I smell like
whiskey and [Laughter] needles that is yeah that's
0:09:58.040,0:10:04.080
uh look for the to come out that's in the you
know we have a we we got a lot coming up this
0:10:04.080,0:10:10.000
year everybody and uh that look beond the look
out for maybe a little bit of a scent of Shawn
0:10:10.000,0:10:15.080
oh there you go I mean on top of everything we
announced in the previous episode uh yeah look
0:10:15.080,0:10:22.600
for that look for that scent scent of me yeah yeah
a bonus anyways Joshua um bonus tell me about your
0:10:22.600,0:10:27.040
Christmas party buddy how'd that go I know we
we probably didn't talk about it on the previous
0:10:27.040,0:10:32.200
episode but if we did tell me about it again no
I don't I don't think we touch base well we had
0:10:32.200,0:10:38.480
our Christmas party a little late this year and
I think I was talking about as far as Christmas
0:10:38.480,0:10:42.960
party everybody should just go to the Christmas
party everybody should experience that don't be
0:10:42.960,0:10:48.680
afraid of the list don't be afraid of the names
that you see on there um but I take it all back
0:10:48.680,0:11:00.760
everybody be very no very afraid of the Christmas
parties okay what happened Joshua well for one
0:11:00.760,0:11:07.240
I mean I thought I I guess I was just walking in
blind but you know when you go to these things you
0:11:07.240,0:11:12.520
you you kind of expect to have a lot of fun right
you're expecting like like how I mentioned all
0:11:12.520,0:11:18.920
the rule just just put the rules aside yeah just
you know play spin the bottle you know take your
0:11:18.920,0:11:28.960
T-shirt off go wild you know pull out twister you
know slap a few people man was my Christmas party
0:11:30.240,0:11:39.520
dull so how' the night start Joshua how just
kidding just kidding it was it was fun was it
0:11:39.520,0:11:47.760
everybody had a [ __ ] blast oh [ __ ] you uh
describe us I want to hear every moment of the
0:11:47.760,0:11:52.480
Christmas party Joshua tell me from the moment
that you you started pregaming to the moment
0:11:52.480,0:11:59.640
that you got home I want to hear every detail oh
man I'm I'm not a great story serously who are you
0:11:59.640,0:12:07.600
Joshua you tell the best stories but I'm going to
try to tell the story from you know how it started
0:12:07.600,0:12:12.800
so got off of work as usual actually I didn't work
that day never mind I take that [ __ ] back see I
0:12:12.800,0:12:20.080
don't even know how to tell stories the right way
so I didn't work that day I had the day off um
0:12:20.080,0:12:27.640
pregaming was supposed to start here at my house
but we switched that up a little bit because my
0:12:27.640,0:12:32.720
girlfriend ended up being the a designated driver
which is awesome everybody should always have a
0:12:32.720,0:12:39.600
designated driver drink safely um we're allowed
to do this here and Sean's L be we drink during
0:12:39.600,0:12:45.040
this occasionally um but whenever you do something
you're going out always have a designated driver
0:12:45.040,0:12:53.200
so we uh me and my girlfriend we took a uh drive
to our friend's house super cool girl um she made
0:12:53.200,0:13:00.440
up some jello shots anybody's familiar with a
jello shot and it wasn't a traditional jello shot
0:13:00.440,0:13:09.160
I forget all the ingredients but she had put um
some spicy was like chamoy or tahen or something
0:13:09.160,0:13:15.480
these are the they were like spicy Jello-O shots
nice uh you know maybe we'll put the recipe later
0:13:15.480,0:13:20.640
but uh I'll have to ask her what she exactly
used but man those things are spicy they tasted
0:13:20.640,0:13:25.600
a whole lot like alcohol and I had like three of
those things and and I was feeling I was feeling
0:13:25.600,0:13:31.520
pretty good took took a couple shots at her house
so I was primed and ready so we hung out at her
0:13:31.520,0:13:39.080
house for a little bit um until she was she was
ready to go and from there where she lives is
0:13:39.080,0:13:44.640
probably only five minutes 10 minutes away from
the venue where we had the party at so we showed
0:13:44.640,0:13:51.080
up naturally there's a DJ there just bumping the
music and if you're looking for shabzi or Drake
0:13:51.080,0:13:58.520
or Twista you know or something you're really just
going to get wild to that's not happening at the
0:13:58.520,0:14:04.080
park party that I went to you're going to hear a
whole lot of Vanda you're going to hear a whole
0:14:04.080,0:14:12.240
lot of freaking you know what what other genres
uh uh know the whole uhia goia yeah yeah you know
0:14:12.240,0:14:17.760
the music genre like your Spotify rap you didn't
have any of that in there but you know the genre
0:14:17.760,0:14:25.000
genre at all oh it was just bumping in there
and it it was a good vibe man everybody with
0:14:25.000,0:14:30.760
smiles you know me and my girlfriend and you know
our our friend who went with the us um who also
0:14:30.760,0:14:36.080
works there you know we all walked in everybody's
smiling everybody's happy everybody's got their
0:14:36.080,0:14:43.760
tables um so from the get-go the vibe is good
you know music's loud if you like to dance to
0:14:43.760,0:14:50.320
the Kia the freaking all that you know you can
that was your that was your spot so naturally
0:14:50.320,0:14:57.160
what what is what do you think I would do Sean
in in just knowing me in the in the year what am
0:14:57.160,0:15:02.840
I doing when I'm walking into a place that's loud
music you know what am I doing what am I doing get
0:15:02.840,0:15:06.840
dance FL sitting at a table I think you're doing
uh one of two things here I think you're knowing
0:15:06.840,0:15:11.120
you Joshua you're probably heading straight for
the bar you're you're as you're heading to the
0:15:11.120,0:15:18.320
bar you're just you're just like hey so and so ah
I see you bro and then you're like making your way
0:15:18.320,0:15:28.120
to the bar um to get drinks I think that's what
you're doing okay uh sadly that is not what I did
0:15:28.120,0:15:34.440
oh oh well I I am yeah yeah sadly so you're this
strike two for you Sean this strike two this a
0:15:34.440,0:15:43.040
working out this new year is not me I'm I'm over
it where's that rope yeah bring the Rope back uh
0:15:43.040,0:15:50.280
I I get there you know natur like I normally do
what sea did but that that Sunday when uh it was
0:15:50.280,0:15:57.560
a long day I was tired you know I probably took
a couple naps uh I wasn't feeling my energetic
0:15:57.560,0:16:03.280
uh social butterf fly self so I I naturally did as
one does when you don't have the most energy even
0:16:03.280,0:16:08.440
after I had taken three jell shots and two regular
shots out of a a tequila bottle you know I thought
0:16:08.440,0:16:14.560
that was going to do it what did I do I sat my
little behind down in a chair and I proceeded to
0:16:14.560,0:16:21.360
people watch oh okay and group watch all right
all right and what did you see Joshua what did
0:16:21.360,0:16:27.520
you see I saw a whole lot of people having fun
and on the inside I was going why can't I have
0:16:27.520,0:16:32.760
that fun was a little kid on the playground that
just felt like he didn't get invited you know to
0:16:32.760,0:16:37.840
go play on the swing set with the rest of the
kids gotcha but I I didn't I also didn't have
0:16:37.840,0:16:48.200
the energy for it either so I sat back I watched
everybody was having a blast um naturally if you
0:16:48.200,0:16:53.840
aren't 21 you're not supposed to be drinking so
I had the I was previewed to the table that was
0:16:53.840,0:16:58.120
directly across from me because I I when I go
into a space I generally like to sit with the
0:16:58.120,0:17:04.920
wall against my back and I am a I like to be able
to observe what's going on in the room I scan I
0:17:04.920,0:17:13.160
just it's just who I am you you were like a Voyer
was that is that what you're is that what you're
0:17:13.160,0:17:21.600
saying Joshua is that I'm GNA let that slide
okay guilty guilty a little bit of voyerism at
0:17:21.600,0:17:28.400
the 2023 Christmas party a little bit of voyerism
you got me it's not just me everybody here Joshua
0:17:29.360,0:17:35.640
being a Voyer at a Christmas party just watching
and multiple tables different personalities all
0:17:35.640,0:17:46.280
that's going on um so I I had the I had the fun
view of the table of uh I don't know if I should
0:17:46.280,0:17:52.920
say this but the table directly across me let's
just say it was a group of people that weren't
0:17:52.920,0:18:02.600
quite 21 oh Tey poppers yeah they they were they
weren't quite 21 but I did observe they were they
0:18:02.600,0:18:09.880
were having a grand old time passing around like
two three flasks full of an unknown substance the
0:18:09.880,0:18:18.320
[ __ ] don't know what was in there okay but could
be Mountain Dew um kids like Mountain Dew and as
0:18:18.320,0:18:22.440
yeah yeah they love Mountain Dew I mean maybe
there's coffee in there because I did I did see a
0:18:22.440,0:18:28.840
change in their mood their mood was changing after
every single drink that they did take out of those
0:18:28.840,0:18:35.000
so maybe it was just some dark roast maybe it was
some Nitro Brew Nitro but there was a change in
0:18:35.000,0:18:40.840
their their their Swagger you know you know maybe
some of them tripped a little bit after this maybe
0:18:40.840,0:18:48.560
some of them their words got a little mumbled um
oh [ __ ] coffee is a [ __ ] you know what I mean
0:18:48.560,0:18:53.680
like you could just drink too much sometimes U
and they kept going outside for some reason so
0:18:53.680,0:18:58.040
maybe they had to use the bathroom a bunch of
times like coffee does that to people it does
0:18:58.040,0:19:04.600
um there was Lines by the bathroom there's there
was a lot going on at that table and it it just
0:19:04.600,0:19:09.960
reminded me of the good old times I used to have
as a youngster like that like going to a Christmas
0:19:09.960,0:19:16.520
party you know they clearly took the advice that
I gave don't follow the rules they listened maybe
0:19:16.520,0:19:24.880
they watch this they listened yeah they listened
um yeah so that was that was that was a a good
0:19:24.880,0:19:29.800
uh a good moment to watch those kids go through
all that and uh have a good time man they were
0:19:29.800,0:19:33.960
they were as responsible as any young adult could
be at a party and and I commend them for that no
0:19:33.960,0:19:40.640
fights broke out nothing silly happened just they
were smiling and uh so that was that was a little
0:19:40.640,0:19:52.320
bit of what I got to observe did they get caught
at one point one of our responsible um hups did
0:19:52.320,0:19:58.080
did step over and okay I think I think they wanted
to know what kind of coffee they were drinking cuz
0:19:58.080,0:20:04.800
they took one whiff out of the bottle oh the three
that they had and and I think it was a little too
0:20:04.800,0:20:13.480
strong because he took it from them oh gosh yeah I
think he he confiscated this the three bottles the
0:20:13.480,0:20:19.960
three flasks um again presumably there's coffee in
there he did he did take three of them away from
0:20:19.960,0:20:24.440
them well I guess that's good a little too much
yeah you don't want to be all jittery you know
0:20:24.440,0:20:30.960
at this Christmas party you know just moderation
you know moderation yes it was it was it was too
0:20:30.960,0:20:38.840
much so uh naturally you know they uh they they
left for a little bit and used the bathroom you
0:20:38.840,0:20:42.920
know they took off for a while and you know so
the table was empty and so I was like oh the
0:20:42.920,0:20:52.680
show's gone but then what happened next the next
show started oh um I like this gift giving yeah
0:20:52.680,0:20:57.160
gifts you know because I don't know if everybody
has uh a Christmas parties where they give away
0:20:57.160,0:21:01.920
gifts okay so they they typically buy a bunch of
cool stuff for where I work you know they'll buy
0:21:01.920,0:21:06.600
the Xbox they'll buy the PlayStation they'll buy
you know the TVs they'll buy all this kind of cool
0:21:06.600,0:21:12.680
stuff whatever you know all the fun stuff so did
they buy a bunch of fun stuff yeah yeah yeah they
0:21:12.680,0:21:17.600
did they did so PlayStation was one of them Xbox
is one of them they even came through with a uh a
0:21:17.600,0:21:24.360
ping pong table oh [ __ ] that's pretty cool they
some beats there was some there was a switch there
0:21:24.360,0:21:30.200
was a another cool thing that that's you know
we'll talk about in a second that you know cuz
0:21:30.200,0:21:35.200
you know every people get to win gifts right some
people win some people are like you know all right
0:21:35.200,0:21:43.400
get to it to it um yeah so party goes you know
everybody's looking forward to the best gift right
0:21:43.400,0:21:48.200
obviously the PlayStation the Xbox everybody's
sitting there you know there's there's I I forget
0:21:48.200,0:21:55.440
was like 60 people I didn't count everybody but
um so first number gets pulled good buddy of mine
0:21:55.440,0:22:01.400
you know we talk we play golf I'm like like man I
hope in my head you know I'm like I hope he gets
0:22:01.400,0:22:05.080
something good yeah I hope he gets something good
he always want those people to get something good
0:22:05.080,0:22:10.480
so yeah so see they're your friends right they
just he's got kids you know it's cool just they
0:22:10.480,0:22:16.000
should always get something so he goes up and the
way they did is they they they did this candy cane
0:22:16.000,0:22:21.240
shape uh thing where you punched a hole in it and
you pull out a number and then whatever the number
0:22:21.240,0:22:27.040
was was the same number of the gift that was okay
so it's kind of like random yeah it's it's random
0:22:27.040,0:22:31.560
it's random yeah so you got to punch a hidden
hidden thing and then then grab a number so he
0:22:31.560,0:22:38.200
punches it you know everybody's like cool you
know all these gifts and this son of a [ __ ]
0:22:38.200,0:22:50.080
what does he do okay first number gets pulled this
lucky guy gets the PlayStation 5 right off the rip
0:22:50.080,0:22:58.920
the very first P that's great PlayStation 5 gone
damn people are yelling rigged he was there when
0:22:58.920,0:23:04.760
it got set up you know the r the the the freaking
wild ones in the back are throwing popcorn at him
0:23:04.760,0:23:11.840
and [ __ ] um not really that didn't happen but
yeah everybody was up and our it's rigged this
0:23:11.840,0:23:17.840
isn't right Jes U but cool I'm I'm glad he got
that so right off the rip play PlayStation 5 is
0:23:17.840,0:23:24.840
gone you know so that is no longer on the table we
still got an Xbox we still got some beats and one
0:23:24.840,0:23:34.280
by one all the good gifts start to go the beatss
are gone the Foosball table's gone oh no and and
0:23:34.280,0:23:40.320
what what is still say and and the freaking the
kids who got the the flas you know the the hydro
0:23:40.320,0:23:49.280
flas thing know the water bottle what' he get he
got another damn water bottle more coffee bro yeah
0:23:49.280,0:23:53.280
yeah more coffee I as soon as he got it he went
out and filled it up I'm assuming because he was
0:23:53.280,0:23:59.800
back and ready to go um got one of those I was
like cool all right so now we're getting down to
0:23:59.800,0:24:05.880
the nitty-gritty right the one solid gift that's
left up there is the Xbox okay there's the new
0:24:05.880,0:24:12.160
Xbox that just came out yeah all right I still
haven't won nothing you know I'm still there's
0:24:12.160,0:24:21.240
still an opportunity to win an Xbox okay yeah
couple more go by okay people get candy baskets
0:24:21.240,0:24:28.640
people get that some person got a freaking weight
set that's a weight set's pretty cool yeah yeah
0:24:28.640,0:24:33.960
but yeah I yes yeah people are doing the left and
the right take of the person who got the weight
0:24:33.960,0:24:41.400
said I felt bad but um that's no neither here nor
there Christmas party [ __ ] right all right Xbox
0:24:41.400,0:24:48.880
is there still there all right and then what
happens so a number gets pulled oh no you know
0:24:48.880,0:24:59.840
dude comes up pulls a number Xbox is gone oh
no Joshua no X and you're now you're looking
0:24:59.840,0:25:04.560
at the gifts everybody at the part is looking
at the gifts like what is there left up there
0:25:04.560,0:25:10.280
to really stick around for you know it's that
awkward kind of thing and and what was left was
0:25:10.280,0:25:19.880
a whole lot of candy baskets you know some other
just random stuff all the filler stuff yeah yeah
0:25:19.880,0:25:28.680
so I I kind of felt bad because you know the the
the person leading the uh the calling the names
0:25:28.680,0:25:34.880
out going to get your number he's kind of noticing
nobody's giving a [ __ ] no more nobody's like all
0:25:34.880,0:25:40.720
the gifts are gone you know so I it's kind of like
all right nobody's listening no more there's still
0:25:40.720,0:25:46.760
gifts on the table so what does he do Hees has a
mic drop moment he just like I'm out it's over and
0:25:46.760,0:25:55.840
so and that's what happened um with the Christmas
party gifts so wait did you not even get a gift
0:25:55.840,0:26:06.160
Joshua I I I I did I did win a gift okay I did win
one but that's not the gift I took home oh what
0:26:06.160,0:26:15.000
the [ __ ] okay yeah the plot the plot thick the
plot thickens so so I I did win a gift everybody
0:26:15.000,0:26:21.120
uh for those of you who do watch this and did
see that uh I did I did grab a gift uh I got one
0:26:21.120,0:26:28.400
of those candy baskets for Joshua okay um Joshua
got a candy basket nice I'm sitting there with my
0:26:28.400,0:26:32.400
candy basket it's like a walk a shame you know you
get that candy basket and you're appreciative of
0:26:32.400,0:26:37.880
the free gift and it it it truly is a walk a shame
you know nobody wants the Candy gift I'm thinking
0:26:37.880,0:26:41.600
damn it you know because people are swapping
gifts out there in the crowd you know people
0:26:41.600,0:26:47.240
were just like a you want that you don't want that
I don't need a freaking um George Foreman gr what
0:26:47.240,0:26:51.400
the hell am I use this for I live at home my mom
you know nobody needs that [ __ ] I um so people
0:26:51.400,0:26:59.520
are swapping right um so my girlfriend was was I
didn't even know this was happening you know was
0:26:59.520,0:27:05.040
kind of half and off in my peripheral over here
they start making deals the [ __ ] making deals
0:27:05.040,0:27:13.200
okay some under the table deals interesting uh all
right so I did I did win a gift okay do you want
0:27:13.200,0:27:18.080
to see it are you interested in my gift I would I
think people I think people or should we wait till
0:27:18.080,0:27:22.320
the end oh you're really I kind want to wait till
the end you want to wait till the end okay Joshua
0:27:22.320,0:27:30.280
we can wait till the end that's fine I I I kind of
I kind of do really putting the the make your wait
0:27:30.280,0:27:35.800
yeah yeah yeah so we'll wait we'll wait we'll get
to what I actually either brought home what I or
0:27:35.800,0:27:40.920
what I won or what I brought home there's okay
that's fine there's a little bit that there um
0:27:40.920,0:27:49.440
so tell me anything else happened so um so once
uh like upper management and everybody started
0:27:49.440,0:27:53.640
kind of like uh started started trickling out I
mean they didn't have to you know sometimes they
0:27:53.640,0:28:00.880
just do this kind of thing but once they started
taking off uh uh the music got a little louder and
0:28:00.880,0:28:09.600
the bar got a little bit more full and the real
dancing begin Let's Go the real Christmas party
0:28:09.600,0:28:16.800
the the real yeah it's like the Afterparty after
party starts um mind you I'm still sitting in my
0:28:16.800,0:28:22.640
chair right I I I probably left a sweat Mark you
know when I got up at some point you know yeah
0:28:22.640,0:28:29.600
just little Wallflower me over here just buzzing
around just sipping on my my 80 degree Modello
0:28:29.600,0:28:35.800
that's been there since I first got there you
know yeah just yeah you can't tell the difference
0:28:35.800,0:28:40.400
between the Melo or freaking uh a bottle of piss
at this point it's just kind of like what the
0:28:40.400,0:28:48.600
hell is this um so the real you know the dancing
started the dancing started and I realized there's
0:28:48.600,0:28:53.720
a lot of people that I work with you know that
did get up on the um dance floor they got moves
0:28:53.720,0:28:59.800
man yeah they got they got they got moves I was
impressed to see what I saw on the Dance Floor
0:28:59.800,0:29:05.560
we see some twerking what's up kind of moves oh
there there was there was there was twerking there
0:29:05.560,0:29:09.920
was no well I mean you can't really twerk to the
freaking you can't really twerk TW whatever you
0:29:09.920,0:29:17.120
want baby I've done it um yeah so so I mean they
were dancing but they you know that you know the
0:29:17.120,0:29:22.040
the bopping you know the freaking you know just
the the the bouncing around that those kind of
0:29:22.040,0:29:28.920
moves you know wasn't you know you know everybody
everybody knows the moves you know you guys I mean
0:29:28.920,0:29:35.680
you know Maris the freaking yeah every every know
the moves so you know pretty athletic you know
0:29:35.680,0:29:42.600
some people you know caught air you know the way
they were bouncing around and people caught air
0:29:42.600,0:29:47.680
[ __ ] that mean you know one point there was
two feet leaving the ground you know there's
0:29:47.680,0:29:52.640
like you know stuff going on out there and I'm
again athletic it's impressive you know people
0:29:52.640,0:29:59.080
are sweating out there people are moving like
like you know Gumby you know rubber man people
0:29:59.080,0:30:09.400
just Jesus Joshua two outdated references my guy
gum I don't know mo I don't dude Gumby come on if
0:30:09.400,0:30:16.160
you don't know Gumby I'm sorry um yeah I mean but
they're moving sorry I mean it's really cool it's
0:30:16.160,0:30:21.480
it's it's yeah so something I cannot do so it's
impressive to me because they're brave enough to
0:30:21.480,0:30:27.920
get up there they're brave enough to move um so
they got that going on but there's one song that
0:30:27.920,0:30:33.920
came on in particular and you may know this song
it's it's some kind of in Spanish it's a it's a
0:30:33.920,0:30:40.840
line dancing song Oh yes they line they L they
line dance yeah okay what's the name of the song
0:30:40.840,0:30:45.960
I don't know what the name I don't know the [ __ ]
name it's like the it's like the Achy Breaky Heart
0:30:45.960,0:30:51.920
song but in Spanish and yeah yeah so there was
there was a number of people that got up there
0:30:51.920,0:30:56.320
and they were getting down to this thing and I
started to ask myself I was like I think that
0:30:56.320,0:31:04.000
is a dance that I could do it is it's very simple
it's very simple but I can you do it yeah can you
0:31:04.000,0:31:09.320
do this dance I can do the dance no you can't I
don't believe you I'll I'll [ __ ] do it right
0:31:09.320,0:31:18.680
now like if if you can do the dance I want
somebody to teach me cuz I I it was fun to
0:31:18.680,0:31:22.440
watch it looked like they were all having a good
time everybody's smiling people are moving around
0:31:22.440,0:31:30.240
and um I I again I I get the sad Wallflower like
I I wish I could do that that was it was it was
0:31:30.240,0:31:36.040
fun to watch everybody you should have got up
there Tred to [ __ ] learn it it's not hard
0:31:36.040,0:31:42.000
yeah I know but I'm I'm I'm not adventurous like
that you didn't even take your own advice Joshua
0:31:42.000,0:31:46.560
you didn't even take your own advice go out there
do something different oh hi I'm Joshua I'm gonna
0:31:46.560,0:31:50.480
go you know I'm gonna [ __ ] tell you to go out
there and do your thing show your titties blah
0:31:50.480,0:31:55.560
blah blah like but I'm going to sit here [ __ ]
vuring everybody I don't give a [ __ ] I want
0:31:55.560,0:32:02.400
to dance too but I'm not going to go out there
[ __ ] you Joshua [ __ ] liar don't you mock me
0:32:02.400,0:32:09.880
don't you mock me who are you Jesus Christ hey
I told you I was tired I had had two naps that
0:32:09.880,0:32:13.560
day or whatever it was I was I was tired had
some of that espresso from those little boys
0:32:13.560,0:32:20.200
all right that would have woke your ass up oh I
as I mentioned I tried to go into it hot with a
0:32:20.200,0:32:26.520
couple jello shots and and two other shots they
just didn't they didn't hit you needed was you
0:32:26.520,0:32:35.680
needed some in you I yeah you're you're absolutely
right I needed a little bit more of that um yeah
0:32:35.680,0:32:39.800
the the Christmas party was good though like I
I did enjoy it we didn't stay all the way till
0:32:39.800,0:32:48.480
the end it it went from 7 o' till 11 at night
we left around 10 o'clock pretty much counted
0:32:48.480,0:32:55.240
our yeah yeah we're a little bit um sometimes
that last hour or 30 minutes of a Christmas
0:32:55.240,0:33:04.440
party can can get pretty hot yeah um but I I was
not there to witness the hotness a I was there
0:33:04.440,0:33:14.200
and everything for anything it's all speculative
at this point and I'm not here to uh uh you know
0:33:14.200,0:33:20.760
uh uh out anybody what they may or may not have
done I was looking forward to the conversation
0:33:20.760,0:33:27.080
about all the runchy sex that you saw like your
two co-workers hooking up and you're like oh oh
0:33:27.080,0:33:33.200
they're married like that's what I wanted buddy
I wanted to know that I guess I'm just going to
0:33:33.200,0:33:39.720
have to go dance without you no we're I mean
we're 33 minutes in and I guess if you made it
0:33:39.720,0:33:42.840
this far I'm allowed to say yeah there were
some titties there were titties there were
0:33:42.840,0:33:49.520
titties and I missed them miss the titties there
was there there were you know I'm trying to keep
0:33:49.520,0:33:55.480
it PG you know we just got out of Christmas this
is 2014 you know let's let's try to clean this
0:33:55.480,0:33:59.680
up a said it we're 33 minutes in people have
either tuned out or they're really focused on
0:33:59.680,0:34:07.160
listening right now and if they if you said they
were titties show the titties let's go cut to
0:34:07.160,0:34:15.440
titties yeah there was some outfits there there
were some there were some cute outfits out there
0:34:15.440,0:34:23.800
that were a bit revealing um I I love confidence
and I and I I appreciate people who get out there
0:34:23.800,0:34:29.240
and you know either forgot the bra in the
trunk seat you know the back seat of their
0:34:29.240,0:34:37.280
car or just decided not to put one on in general
but I applaud you um keep just keep doing what
0:34:37.280,0:34:43.240
you're doing because that confidence is hot hey
Josh we're in all we're an allinclusive podcast
0:34:43.240,0:34:51.120
here uh were there any dicks in there too you
know any schlongs hanging out did someone forget
0:34:51.120,0:35:02.160
their uh no forget their pants maybe have some
short this was a a no this was a uh pants shoes
0:35:02.160,0:35:08.800
or no entry with you know those signs you know
like you had to show up no there's no crotchless
0:35:08.800,0:35:16.640
there's nobody wearing chaps you know this nobody
just assless walking in um no well that's a shame
0:35:16.640,0:35:22.320
there was there was some cute outfits you know
cute outfits titties next year Joshua I want you
0:35:22.320,0:35:30.240
to be the guy with the short shorts showing Mr
like a little nutsack you know a little uh Fu
0:35:30.240,0:35:34.840
what do they call it a ball and Spoon spoon
and ball I don't [ __ ] know buddy just show
0:35:34.840,0:35:42.360
your balls that's all I want I I'm trying to
decide if I you know I should continue to go
0:35:42.360,0:35:47.840
to Christmas parties after this last one not
that I didn't have fun not that I didn't have
0:35:47.840,0:35:56.800
fun um it was it was enjoyable it really was I I
just don't know if I'm starting to to phase into
0:35:56.800,0:36:03.520
to uh the lighter drinking stage of my life the
lighter said you had three jell shots and then
0:36:03.520,0:36:09.640
two shots straight to the Dome we watched you
on a previous week take like 16 bourbon shots
0:36:09.640,0:36:19.160
what do you mean you're slowing down Sean this
is 2014 you son of a [ __ ] oh wait no 2000 wait
0:36:19.160,0:36:26.800
how many shots have you taken today wait wait
hold on what is in that Yoda cup it's not as
0:36:26.800,0:36:38.720
espresso 2024 oh [ __ ] hold on okay there we
go I didn't I didn't turn off the [ __ ] go to
0:36:38.720,0:36:47.200
bed [ __ ] thing Joshua it's 2024 what do you
mean you're not drinking [Music] now to no I
0:36:47.200,0:36:54.200
I didn't say I wasn't drinking I said I was gonna
you know maybe just smid it back a little bit you
0:36:54.200,0:36:59.000
know like instead of going 85 on the freeway
I'm going going 75 now just just back it off
0:36:59.000,0:37:03.680
leave a little bit more gas in the tank for
the long journey okay so moderation is what
0:37:03.680,0:37:09.520
you're telling me yeah moderation just extend
it out extend it out you buy the bottle make
0:37:09.520,0:37:16.440
the bottle last the bottle isn't just supposed to
be for one night it's supposed to be for multiple
0:37:16.440,0:37:23.480
night what if we buy the bottle specifically for
one night though I mean if that's if that's the
0:37:23.480,0:37:30.960
goal I mean I can say we can do that I I'm
okay with with having um premeditated bottle
0:37:30.960,0:37:43.320
service I'm I can go into a situation premeditated
yes I can do that it's it's it's possible so
0:37:43.320,0:37:47.920
Christmas party went well then you guys were
out of there by 10: uh what time were you in
0:37:47.920,0:37:51.720
bed Joshua did you jerk off anytime between that
you know it's all these beautiful outfits or did
0:37:51.720,0:37:57.240
you just head straight to bed you know maybe
that's why I was so tired tired I had to get it
0:37:57.240,0:38:02.000
all out of my system before I even showed up cuz
I knew there was going to be you know titties I
0:38:02.000,0:38:10.560
knew I I don't want to be you know uh uh what's
the word I I I didn't want to be tempted temped
0:38:10.560,0:38:16.720
accidentally you know I don't want to be tempted
like like Sean you know when New Year's rubbing
0:38:16.720,0:38:23.720
up against butts you know just squeeing grabbing
crowd bro don't worry about it they're pushing me
0:38:23.720,0:38:29.320
yeah yeah you run into this guy in a crowd please
you know like the police put your hands up tell
0:38:29.320,0:38:36.760
this guy just keep him where I can see him anytime
you run around this guy Jesus but success yeah but
0:38:36.760,0:38:42.200
I I don't know I'm gonna I'm going to re-evaluate
uh next year when when the Christmas party comes
0:38:42.200,0:38:50.360
around I would I would love to go um it just I
I think I think I may have to step it up a notch
0:38:50.360,0:38:57.640
and have a premeditated bottle before you think
that was what you think think that was what was
0:38:57.640,0:39:05.520
holding you back was on having a premeditated
bottle well I it's it's not like you live next
0:39:05.520,0:39:12.520
door you know I don't I don't have you know a
a solid uh wingman these days you know you're
0:39:12.520,0:39:19.000
you're quite a bit of ways you know and the jalous
shots worked I I I did enjoy you know our you know
0:39:19.000,0:39:23.600
our friend I'm going to keep her name quiet for
this um but she did a great job on those I love
0:39:23.600,0:39:29.920
those [ __ ] things I want more of those you know
makes really good she makes really good uh drinks
0:39:29.920,0:39:34.000
well hopefully you can give me the [ __ ] recipe
so I can put it into the episode or have Mia put
0:39:34.000,0:39:39.560
it into the episode so don't [ __ ] forget I mean
they were awesome they did the [ __ ] trick I'm
0:39:39.560,0:39:45.800
I'm I mean they just didn't do enough I needed
more I I was I needed I needed something hot I
0:39:45.800,0:39:51.200
needed something fiery I needed you know I don't
I don't know some moonshine or something I need
0:39:51.200,0:39:56.600
to blow fire I need I need something to really
get me going I got you cuz my tank was not not
0:39:56.600,0:40:02.840
ready for it so you'll reevaluate try it again
next year this time this time next year you will
0:40:02.840,0:40:07.720
tell us again if it was worth going to that
Christmas party correct is that what is that
0:40:07.720,0:40:13.360
what we can hold you to it correct correct I'm
I'm gonna come with it again next uh Christmas
0:40:13.360,0:40:20.200
party and and who knows maybe maybe we just throw
a a off Christmas Christmas party just to relive
0:40:20.200,0:40:24.680
you know like maybe we do our own little thing
later in the year me and you and get a a group
0:40:24.680,0:40:29.160
of friends together and we just we put all the
sorry for the delay crew all the people you see
0:40:29.160,0:40:33.560
you don't see behind the scenes you know get them
all together have a little Christmas party I'm all
0:40:33.560,0:40:41.080
for it I'm on forward Joshua you know yeah we got
a we got a a few uh people who aren't shy you know
0:40:41.080,0:40:48.480
to to come out I'll teach you how to line dance
it'll be perfect I'm I I I'm not joking when I
0:40:48.480,0:40:54.040
say I want to learn how to do that dance like I I
want it's not hard tell somebody I can dance it's
0:40:54.040,0:41:00.760
real easy it's real easy but things aren't hard to
people who do them you know everybody has to start
0:41:00.760,0:41:06.200
from somewhere Joshua I started from nowhere I can
bring you with me on this journey of you learning
0:41:06.200,0:41:12.440
how to line dance it's part of your culture you
know your heritage all right line dancing it is
0:41:12.440,0:41:20.040
you're absolutely right you're absolutely right
both my cultures both your cultures we'll teach
0:41:20.040,0:41:24.720
you don't worry Joshua we got this it'll be fine
because I got two cultures I don't just got one
0:41:24.720,0:41:32.920
yeah I'm a I'm a hybrid HDs yeah yeah I got this
there's a whole lot going on in this body right
0:41:32.920,0:41:38.720
here oh [ __ ] joshu well hey thank you Joshua for
giving us a a summary of your Christmas party it
0:41:38.720,0:41:48.160
sounds fun my Christmas party is I believe this
week at the time of oh well yes when this comes
0:41:48.160,0:41:55.400
out yes it'll be this week so I'll have some type
of uh Christmas party report for you as well and
0:41:55.400,0:42:04.200
that'll be fun to compare so we'll see yeah I can
you please do a a request for the song I want you
0:42:04.200,0:42:10.560
to walk up to the DJ and I want you to request the
song because I I mean we all know where you live
0:42:10.560,0:42:16.920
I mean the state you live in um are they getting
down where you are like that are they are is your
0:42:16.920,0:42:22.560
DJ bumping I don't know let me put it this way
Mariachi is he bump is he bumping all that kind
0:42:22.560,0:42:27.720
of you know is he getting down when uh excuse me
so when we first got up here and had our first
0:42:27.720,0:42:33.600
Christmas party here uh it was at a bowling alley
which was really fun so it was nobody was dejing
0:42:33.600,0:42:41.640
but music was playing but it was like U pop hits
you know pop hits uh this year yeah we were gonna
0:42:41.640,0:42:46.760
have a DJ and the DJ that we were going to have
was actually one of our uh one of our managers
0:42:46.760,0:42:54.440
he was going to come out and DJ because he does
that in his off time um but the venue changed um
0:42:54.440,0:43:00.920
and now we're having our Christmas party at a dve
and Busters so there probably won't be a DJ but
0:43:00.920,0:43:10.320
there will still be lots of fun and I will let you
know if anybody has sex on the [Laughter] floor
0:43:10.320,0:43:19.080
Jesus oh man thank you for sharing Joshua now
do you have a new segment lined up for us today
0:43:19.080,0:43:29.880
Joshua I I don't have a new segment lined up
today damn I was I I uh I I didn't dig deep
0:43:29.880,0:43:36.680
enough uh for the segment that we kind of went
over was it two episodes ago um so that that
0:43:36.680,0:43:44.000
is an upand cominging segment that is still in
the birthing phase it it's it hasn't quite hit
0:43:44.000,0:43:52.200
uh uh you know full full maturity oh it's still
a little teen it's coming though it's it's it's
0:43:52.200,0:43:58.720
coming okay all right well then Joshua it's
coming I mean we got like 15 minutes left do
0:43:58.720,0:44:03.120
you want to talk about some uh some fun finds
maybe cuz I got a few fun finds that I want to
0:44:03.120,0:44:08.640
talk about I don't want to get into Fun finds
yet what I want to talk about is something that
0:44:08.640,0:44:12.440
bothers me a lot that I saw today oh [ __ ]
all right joshu lay it on me let me get let
0:44:12.440,0:44:20.040
me get comfortable here this is an active topic
yeah this is active and I hope people get heated
0:44:20.040,0:44:24.680
on this one okay lay it on us I want people
to get mad I want people to get upset I want
0:44:24.680,0:44:30.760
people to stock up on their hand sanitizer
and think twice next time they go to shake
0:44:30.760,0:44:37.560
somebody's hand okay what the [ __ ] you
talking about it's could be anybody okay
0:44:37.560,0:44:47.960
but as a a very clean in in health conscious and
very uh uh you know hygienic like somebody who
0:44:47.960,0:44:55.960
takes care of themselves you know I I brush my
teeth you know I wash my I wash my hands yes um
0:44:58.360,0:45:07.520
so today as we all do as Shawn does that's how
he became the top three% of Drake we go to the
0:45:07.520,0:45:15.680
bathroom occasionally yep that we do yeah you know
that that reference might make some you know sense
0:45:15.680,0:45:25.600
to some of you um from our old 11 episode watch
that one it's fun yeah supplemental yeah uh so
0:45:25.600,0:45:33.280
our top three Drake I mean maybe this guy's a
top three Drake guy too but I'm in the bathroom
0:45:33.280,0:45:40.480
minding my business [ __ ] taking a fat dookie no
no no no no I'm I'm I'm just the old just holding
0:45:40.480,0:45:47.840
the old uh old carrot stick you know I'm just
I'm just so you're jerking off got it no I'm
0:45:47.840,0:45:55.160
not doing that but you know I'm I'm shaking it
off as as a man you know as somebody who swings
0:45:55.160,0:45:58.360
something between their legs legs does yeah he
swinging it off and then what do you do after
0:45:58.360,0:46:05.480
you swing it off you uh you go wash your hands
what what really is that what you're supposed
0:46:05.480,0:46:12.040
to do well I mean you put it away first and then
you go wash your hands but you're supposed to wash
0:46:12.040,0:46:16.880
your hands yeah how come somebody didn't tell
this [ __ ] that he's supposed to [ __ ] wash
0:46:16.880,0:46:25.640
his hands Joshua I can't tell you how many times
I've seen this throughout my [ __ ] 42 years of
0:46:25.640,0:46:34.120
Liv there have been multiple times multiple like
different different age groups different [ __ ]
0:46:34.120,0:46:42.840
uh ethnicities like so many people don't wash
their [ __ ] hands after going pee and I don't
0:46:42.840,0:46:49.680
know why it's a thing and it's [ __ ] disgusting
all right like you're still like you your body is
0:46:49.680,0:46:56.160
like sweating down there you're [ __ ] uh maybe
you didn't wipe correctly before like like after
0:46:56.160,0:47:02.400
you took a [ __ ] like you have germs my guys like
you [ __ ] need to wash your hands it's [ __ ]
0:47:02.400,0:47:16.080
disgusting sir this story gets better oh my God
it doesn't stop at me watching this person okay
0:47:16.080,0:47:26.200
uh not wash their hands after they they shook
off their probably statistically uh not so no
0:47:26.200,0:47:30.880
no no no not so average size just just based off
statistics I'm going to go with he probably is
0:47:30.880,0:47:38.720
not shaking a big stick um not judging but he was
standing pretty close to the urinal when he went
0:47:38.720,0:47:44.760
is that what you judge it off of how far away you
standing to the UR he might as well be putting it
0:47:44.760,0:47:53.160
right against the wall because he uh he was up
to it pretty [ __ ] close all right got it got
0:47:53.160,0:47:58.600
it don't know why you got stand that close but
he did um which you know his hands right there
0:47:58.600,0:48:07.920
too he he had to some freaking Drip Drop um so
yeah okay I wash my hands walk out I'm thinking
0:48:07.920,0:48:15.640
in my head what the son of a gun you know what
the [ __ ] dude you know this guy this is where
0:48:15.640,0:48:24.360
gets really good this son of a [ __ ] he walks up
to his vers victim oh no touches him on there can
0:48:24.360,0:48:30.160
I get a he goes he goes hey again not trying to
alienate this guy but he should learn from this
0:48:30.160,0:48:37.240
this [ __ ] what I'm talking about here everybody
else should too you know that's disgusting Jos
0:48:37.240,0:48:42.400
per usual people give two [ __ ] about this
guy what does he do next he walks up to the
0:48:42.400,0:48:50.760
next person he rubs his [ __ ] hand on him
again so this guy's walking around the store
0:48:50.760,0:48:57.920
Rin his goddamn dick all over everybody's [ __ ]
sweaters and shirts and skin along with whatever
0:48:57.920,0:49:04.760
piss he probably dribbled on his short little
[ __ ] hands know like uh I don't know how to
0:49:04.760,0:49:12.240
rephrase this but everybody if you use your hands
to go to the bathroom please be mindful of other
0:49:12.240,0:49:20.800
people and their their you know their hygiene and
uh wash your hands please the signs aren't there
0:49:20.800,0:49:29.560
just just to read it's not a comic book in the
in the bathroom wash your damn hands and don't
0:49:29.560,0:49:34.240
go around touching people if you don't want to
wash your hands [ __ ] gross is [ __ ] gross
0:49:34.240,0:49:42.120
yeah Joshua yeah he he so I I you know I did the
right thing I think I did the right thing and you
0:49:42.120,0:49:52.200
know what I did I told some of my co-workers damn
that's how you do it is that wrong I I war and
0:49:52.200,0:49:59.520
specifically I did Target those who I know this
individual talks to and he does touch I've seen
0:49:59.520,0:50:09.400
it oh that's gross I said be careful this guy
does not wash his hands after touching his dick
0:50:09.400,0:50:20.040
nasty I don't know uh some may find that funny
some might find that gross but it should be
0:50:20.040,0:50:27.320
educational at the end of the day moral of the
story is please ladies and gentlemen wash your
0:50:27.320,0:50:33.720
hands after you use the restroom whether or
not you think it's dirty or not just wash
0:50:33.720,0:50:39.960
your [ __ ] hands it takes [ __ ] 30 seconds
less than 30 seconds sometimes wash your hands
0:50:39.960,0:50:45.200
with soap and water not just put your hands
underneath the sink [ __ ] soap and water you
0:50:45.200,0:50:53.240
sickos don't forget your thumbs either yeah don't
forget those thumbs those those appendages those
0:50:53.240,0:50:58.000
thumms yeah those that's actually what's support
the whole grip I mean that's the most important
0:50:58.000,0:51:04.480
finger on that hand yeah you're not doing
this you know who's grabbing it like this
0:51:04.480,0:51:11.840
you know nobody's doing that yeah you're you're
nobody's doing that especially when you're right
0:51:11.840,0:51:16.080
up against the wall you know you're freaking
pressed up against J uh this kind of bring I
0:51:16.080,0:51:19.120
mean we're already at [ __ ] we're we have
nine minutes to go here but this brings up
0:51:19.120,0:51:24.040
something I want like I had a visual of um
how do you feel about people who just pull
0:51:24.040,0:51:33.040
down their entire pants and just pee is that
a how do you feel about that buddy there's no
0:51:33.040,0:51:39.120
place for that Ser you're saying there's not
a there's no place for a grown ass man to pull
0:51:39.120,0:51:47.360
down his pants and piss in urinal that's not a
thing shouldn't happen no I I I would highly I
0:51:47.360,0:51:51.960
would they should put up a sign for that too
and the sign should be on the floor next to
0:51:51.960,0:51:58.760
all the piss that's surrounding the toilet I don't
think I think showing I don't think those people
0:51:58.760,0:52:05.120
realize how much pee actually gets on you have
you ever peed with flipflops on it's disgusting
0:52:05.120,0:52:16.360
like h i h oh Joshua you know all about that
we we can revisit that story another time um
0:52:16.360,0:52:24.760
I was yeah yeah yeah another please another time
yeah flip flops and peing all right Joshua let's
0:52:24.760,0:52:31.840
get to our finds cuz I got one I got actually
got a I think I have a value find this year
0:52:31.840,0:52:38.000
this this what am I trying to say here I got
a my first value find of the Year buddy I have
0:52:38.000,0:52:47.080
one but I want to know if you have anything buddy
you want me to go first you always go first I I
0:52:47.080,0:52:53.280
mean I I do right I'm okay thank you for being
such a gentleman always for you baby well what
0:52:53.280,0:52:58.520
you all have been waiting for I mentioned it
earlier in the episode what did Joshua bring
0:52:58.520,0:53:04.720
home did he bring home the gift that he won
or did he steal a gift from somebody else he
0:53:04.720,0:53:10.640
stole something you stole something I know you
did let's see it originally I ended up with a
0:53:10.640,0:53:16.120
a bag of candy which was cool I found that that
bag of candy went to somebody's uh mother which
0:53:16.120,0:53:20.880
wait wait what was in the bag of candy before
you revealed this um it was like a bunch of
0:53:20.880,0:53:25.360
popcorn it was a bunch of uh I don't know if it's
like Seas candy it was it was like one of those
0:53:25.360,0:53:30.240
bags you get from Costco or you know one of your
local just like just like a bag you know with a
0:53:30.240,0:53:33.920
basket and a bunch of stuff in it so it was cool
chocolate and cool stuff and he gave it to his
0:53:33.920,0:53:42.400
mom which is great great to hear that that that
went somewhere um in in uh in and in the swap that
0:53:42.400,0:53:48.880
took place you know I ended up with something
that I've been really wanting to buy if if you
0:53:48.880,0:53:55.880
don't know I really love the animated cartoon up
and I just got so lucky so somebody from above or
0:53:55.880,0:54:00.640
whatever you know look to the stars but I ended
up with this bad boy which I'm extremely happy
0:54:00.640,0:54:12.760
about it's kind of big but I got to skip back
oh nice very [ __ ] cool buddy very cool that
0:54:12.760,0:54:21.600
is the Lego set for Joshua you know what's funny
about that I too have that set I I can't I can't
0:54:21.600,0:54:29.680
reach it but I do have it it's over here yeah
Dam that's so [ __ ] cool I [ __ ] I love up D
0:54:29.680,0:54:34.000
I love up it's like one of my passionate like I
I actually I I'll show it at some point maybe in
0:54:34.000,0:54:39.280
one of the later episodes if we ever get to
up again um I have a handdrawn um an artist
0:54:39.280,0:54:45.680
actually Drew out a uh picture or portrait up
my wall over here pretty [ __ ] awesome I love
0:54:45.680,0:54:50.520
up I love it that's [ __ ] cool josua that's
[ __ ] cool and it only took you one bag of
0:54:50.520,0:54:58.400
candy yes sir dring and a good-hearted person
that's why I wanted repeat uh thank you to the
0:54:58.400,0:55:03.720
gentleman who did that that was that was great I
gave him a hug today that was very very awesome
0:55:03.720,0:55:07.680
he kind of looked at me like what and I was like
yeah dude like I love he just was like whatever
0:55:07.680,0:55:15.600
but yeah like I was super appreciative yeah don't
hug me nice buddy that makes me that that makes
0:55:15.600,0:55:21.720
my heart happy I'm glad glad you're able to get
something [ __ ] awesome for something that was
0:55:21.720,0:55:29.480
not so cool yeah we're out great you got anything
else for us anything else you want to show off
0:55:29.480,0:55:33.680
that's that's all I got man that was my great
that was oh [ __ ] we're Jos we're completely
0:55:33.680,0:55:39.920
going over the fact did you have to write this
off like do is is this going on your taxes buddy
0:55:39.920,0:55:46.960
like I know it's a just a quick tangent just
yes or no quick tangent on the books I got
0:55:46.960,0:55:53.560
candy just saying all right nailed it perfect
on the books everybody you heard them you got
0:55:53.560,0:56:01.640
candy don't don't worry about what else you
got nice all right cool um Joshua I have my I
0:56:01.640,0:56:10.400
have a value find not a fun find a value find
Joshua we all love funkos and you know that's
0:56:10.400,0:56:14.840
this is slowly becoming a Funko podcast where
we just buy funkos to write them off like it's
0:56:14.840,0:56:23.880
fine this is how this goes um but I was able to
procure I did it again I'm so good at this uh
0:56:23.880,0:56:35.040
this Funko for the Glorious price of $4.98 Joshua
are you ready wow okay lay it on us I think you'll
0:56:35.040,0:56:41.360
be familiar with this one Joshua because it comes
from your time period That's Right Joshua it's Mr
0:56:41.360,0:56:49.720
Bill I don't know I'm just bill bill is
Schoolhouse Rock Joshua Schoolhouse Rock
0:56:49.720,0:56:54.880
my guy you were you were born in like the 70s
or some some [ __ ] like that 50s um [Music]
0:56:56.840,0:57:07.880
dick listen listen I got Mr Bill here all right
Joshua Mr Bill is going currently selling for
0:57:07.880,0:57:16.840
$50 Joshua whoa smackaroonies [ __ ] I was
ecstatic all right I've been looking for Mr
0:57:16.840,0:57:24.000
Bill for a while uh mainly because I like the
song and it's really catchy but we found him at
0:57:24.000,0:57:29.480
Target and um I was like oh [ __ ] yeah let's
like I was like going back and forth and I was
0:57:29.480,0:57:33.920
like ah maybe not and then I was like I scanned
him and I was like oh [ __ ] he's selling for
0:57:33.920,0:57:39.000
50 bucks right now and I already had set him
down and you know that feeling where you're
0:57:39.000,0:57:44.400
like ah [ __ ] like I set it down someone's
gonna find him I had to go run back through
0:57:44.400,0:57:49.080
the whole entire store luckily he was still on
the same shelf nobody has any admiration for Mr
0:57:49.080,0:57:57.120
Bill like I do got him went to scan usually
these funkos are about 12 eight bucks right
0:57:57.120,0:58:07.120
he was on sale for [ __ ] seven something
$7 and then I had a few dollars in credit
0:58:07.120,0:58:15.120
from Target so I used that [ __ ] got him for
$4 I'm all profit baby I'm all profit right
0:58:15.120,0:58:26.280
now I love your find Sean but that still does not
beat my Hobby Lobby find a Hobby Lobby fight you
0:58:26.280,0:58:31.480
got to go back and look at that episode The Hobby
Lobby fight that you got to go back and see that
0:58:31.480,0:58:37.320
episode I don't remember what episode that is
you cannot beat you cannot beat my Hobby Lobby
0:58:37.320,0:58:45.760
F I'm still up I still have the best value I mean
for this year though 2024 you have the best I got
0:58:45.760,0:58:50.320
the best 2023 yes you did I will give you that
all right but so far I mean the year's starting
0:58:50.320,0:58:55.320
off strong for me with the funkos so as the year
goes on maybe you can find one to talk top mine
0:58:55.320,0:59:02.160
who knows who knows buddy yeah all right you want
to end it with a fortune some numbers what you
0:59:02.160,0:59:06.560
thinking yeah let's kick it off with the fortune
we still got the as we as we nor got the same
0:59:06.560,0:59:11.760
cookies are we doing some good cookies what do we
got yeah no we got we got uh we got the Special
0:59:11.760,0:59:15.760
K cookies Special K not sponsored but if Special
K does want to sponsor us go ahead and hit us up
0:59:15.760,0:59:22.200
at sorry for delay at gmail.com hit me up dude
how cool would that be to get a fortune cookie
0:59:22.200,0:59:29.360
sponsor that would be [ __ ] love it great please
do it would be raining cookies I promise Special K
0:59:29.360,0:59:34.920
come through I will rain cookies every at the end
of every episode hundreds of cookies on my head
0:59:34.920,0:59:38.960
I will pull string and cookies will fall I would
love to see whatever Falls in my hand be the cook
0:59:38.960,0:59:46.600
[ __ ] see that yeah Special okay come through
we're reaching out right here right now all right
0:59:46.600,0:59:55.160
everybody let's get to the cookie all right as
we always do let's give it a little crack H put
0:59:55.160,1:00:02.760
it all over my carpet you hate that too I know
you hate that I got got a vacuum every time we
1:00:02.760,1:00:19.760
do this um so our Fortune for January 9th 2024 is
going to be to make dreams real first you have to
1:00:19.760,1:00:27.240
have them oh that's nice Special K always coming
through love it I love it this was just a dream
1:00:27.240,1:00:33.360
Joshua this was a dream that we had great one and
now look at it it's coming true buddy true I love
1:00:33.360,1:00:38.120
that that was a great great Fortune i' love to
start it off with that and we're going to flip
1:00:38.120,1:00:44.400
this bad boy over because we're lucky enough
for for Special K again uh for sponsoring us
1:00:44.400,1:00:48.920
um you know if we say it does that make it true
can we just can we just keep saying it and then
1:00:48.920,1:00:55.520
eventually it'll happen hey the fortune says
that you got to dream it first right Special
1:00:55.520,1:00:58.960
K come
1:00:58.960,1:01:14.080
through all right for this Fortune uh today
we got the lucky numbers of 20 35 14 45 39
1:01:14.080,1:01:21.200
and 19 that's really funny Joshua hang on wait
that's really funny because in our end of the
1:01:21.200,1:01:27.640
year episode uh you said the most popular
numbers for our fortunes most of them ended
1:01:27.640,1:01:35.120
in sixes and I don't think there's one six
in that in that that lucky numbers there's
1:01:35.120,1:01:41.760
not that's crazy lucky K [ __ ] blowing my
mind or Special K lucky K sponsor us whoever
1:01:41.760,1:01:49.000
it is we want to see fortune cookies raining
from the ceiling at some point this year I'm
1:01:49.000,1:01:52.920
sorry j go ahead and repeat the lucky numbers
first that's I'm going to read them one more
1:01:52.920,1:01:59.480
time just because sometimes they get missed
um and sometimes I misspeak so once again for
1:01:59.480,1:02:12.760
our lucky numbers on January 9th Lucky Number
20 35 14 45 39 and 19 let's have a great year
1:02:12.760,1:02:20.560
everybody nice couldn't have said it any better
Joshua that will wrap it up on episode 15 of
1:02:20.560,1:02:27.120
sorry for the delay thank you guys so much for
watching thank you for listening um please go
1:02:27.120,1:02:34.320
to the website linking down in the dooblydoo down
there um check us out I don't know get the merch
1:02:34.320,1:02:41.800
uh I think that's all I have to say Joshua
let's go no that's it yeah goodbye everybody
1:02:41.800,1:02:48.080
[Music]
1:02:48.080,1:02:54.360
enjoy
1:02:54.360,1:03:05.480
[Music] n
